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DBT Interpersonal Effectiveness
Skills for asking for what you need, saying no, and maintaining relationships while respecting yourself.
Core Interpersonal Skills
DEARMAN - Getting What You Want
- • Describe - State the facts
- • Express - Share your feelings
- • Assert - Ask clearly for what you want
- • Reinforce - Explain benefits
- • Mindful - Stay focused on your goal
- • Appear confident - Eye contact, steady voice
- • Negotiate - Be willing to compromise
GIVE - Maintaining Relationships
- • Gentle - Be kind, no attacks
- • Interested - Listen actively
- • Validate - Acknowledge their perspective
- • Easy manner - Use humor, smile
FAST - Maintaining Self-Respect
- • Fair - Be fair to yourself and others
- • Apologies - Don't over-apologize
- • Stick to values - Don't compromise your values
- • Truthful - Be honest, don't lie
Setting Boundaries
Learn to say no effectively while maintaining relationships:
- • Be clear and direct
- • Don't over-explain or justify
- • Offer alternatives when appropriate
- • Stay firm but respectful
Recovery-Specific Applications
Asking for support when struggling
Use DEARMAN to clearly ask for help
Setting boundaries with users
Use FAST to maintain self-respect
Repairing damaged relationships
Use GIVE to rebuild trust